Reference– https://bravehearts.org.au/about-child-sexual-abuse/what-is-grooming

Grooming describes the preparatory stage of child sexual abuse and exploitation, often undertaken to gain the trust and/or compliance of the child or young person and to establish secrecy and silence to avoid disclosure. Grooming may happen in person or online.

Often, the child’s parents, carers and other significant adults (including organisations) are also groomed by the person intending to sexually harm the child. This can make it challenging for parents and caretakers to establish if a child is being groomed, as grooming behaviours often look similar to genuine caring behaviours.

Key takeaway–    Grooming almost always precedes the actual abuse, and detecting it early provides opportunity to stop the abuse from happening!

Grooming may involve:

• Building the child’s trust: Using presents, special attention, treats, spending time together and playing games with non-sexual physical contact.
• Favouritism: The offender treats the child as an adult; treating them differently and making them feel like a unique friend, making the child feel more special than others.
• Gaining the trust of the child’s parents or carer/s: Careful to be ‘seen’ as a close, caring and reliable relative or friend of the family.
• Isolation (from family, friends): To ensure secrecy and lessen chances of disclosure or belief.
• Intimidation and secrecy: The offender may use coercion e.g., threatening looks and body language, glares, stalking and rules of secrecy.
• ‘Testing the waters’ or boundary violation: ‘Innocent’ touching, gradually developing into ‘accidental’ sexual contact.
• Shaping the child’s perceptions: The child is often confused as to what is acceptable and can take on self-blame for the situation, as his/her viewpoint can become totally distorted.

Conversation starters:

1. Do you think that you could detect grooming behaviours?
   1. What would you do if you concluded a child was being groomed?